Imran yes we “Khan’t”, even when assets declared

Mr. Khan is a man of great integrity, a true son of Pakistan and a great Muslim (the "he's a Mossad agent" conspiracy theories seem to have died down). He has built a hospital that cures cancer, has committed himself to education, eradicating corruption and promoting idealism. He wants a free Pakistan, wants to throw out the imperial troops of the Empire (in this case, not Darth Vader’s boys but rather the constantly meddling American Army, the infernal CIA and devilspawn NATO). All in all, his scheme sounds noble, leaving his audience the impression of Mr. Khan sitting atop a white horse, glittering scimitar held in one hand as he holds the reigns in the other with a determined look on his face, as if he is out to behead the enemy during a time of war (and the holy justified jihad look is complete). The urban elite finds him to be a “cool” politician who has rock stars performing at his rallies. Others feel that they have been let down by the PPP, the PML-N and the military and Mr. Khan may be the only viable solution to the numerous socio-economic and political issues that plague Pakistan. Almost all of our citizens believe he is incorruptible and therefore corruption will be dealt with seriously making him the only viable contender. Young Pakistanis in general, and younger urban Punjabis ("the youth") specifically seem to think he is the greatest thing to happen to Pakistan since Atif Aslam. Indeed, the man and his party have become a rallying point for those who want “Change” (Obama flashbacks anyone?).

I am about to admit something that makes most of urban Punjab look at me strangely (at times, even murderously). I am not an Imran Khan supporter (surprise of surprises!). I do not feel his agenda has been outlined properly and I feel he takes the very real and immediate threat of militancy far too lightly. I feel his alliance with the right wing ultra conservative religious parties can pressurize him into making patriarchal decisions that could affect Pakistan adversely. I think his priorities are a bit muddled, terrorism is the thing we need to fight the most as opposed to turning a blind eye to it and thinking everything will be okay once we kick America off our soil. However, all that being said, I do love the idealism he displays. For that one reason, I feel I should give him a chance to prove how liberal he is. So, despite all these reasons I have cited for not wanting Mr. Khan to run our fair country, there is still one way I (and possibly others like me) would happily vote for him (or for any other political entity that undertakes what i am about to suggest). Unlike many others, Ms. Veena Malik has exposed her assets (and has done so much more elegantly than most of our politicians could) and we have found nothing wrong with them. If any of our politicians allow her to join their party and contest elections, I will vote for said party. This I swear!

The cricketer on his way to political rock-stardom

In a recently aired discussion with veteran journalist Mr. Arif Nizami, ex cricketer turned politician Mr. Imran Khan defended himself as a leftist. He expressed his desire to establish a welfare state with a more socialist view concerning the economy. He spoke passionately about the anti-imperialism agenda he wishes to follow – once again appealing to the audience that he is indeed left liberal. Mr. Khan’s wonderful Shaukat Khanum Cancer Hospital was mentioned to show what a good philanthropist the good cricketer is. A few days after the interview, Mr. Khan organized his biggest rally to date. While different agencies and papers are reporting conflicting numbers, there is no denying that people turned up for it en masse.

Mr. Khan appears to have learnt the game of politics at last. Alliances have been forged; a few big names have joined the Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf. The party was until recently described as a “one man show” by many politicians. There are many rumors of the Inter Services Intelligence Agency backing him as they see him as a better rightist alternative to ex premier Mian Muhammad Nawaz Sharif; a man who has interfered with the military before and even now calls for curbing its power.

While his ambitions seem honorable, there are many issues he seems to be silent on. He talks about empowering women, talks about how his vote base is many educated urbanites and the “youth”. He does not talk about his affiliation with the religious parties or what his strategy is to stop extremism. Mr. Khan seems to believe that the only thing plaguing Pakistan is corruption, not religious extremism, not xenophobia, and certainly not the rights of minorities. He goes on about “daughter of the nation” Aafia Siddiqui but has not done a single thing to help out Asia Bibi, the Christian women on death row over blasphemy charges. Contradictions seem to emerge in his party philosophy. He told the Daily Telegraph while sitting in London that his party was in favor of changing the dictator created blasphemy law that was never blessed by a parliament. His political workers attended a pro Qadri rally (the murderer of the late Punjab Governor Taseer) and announced that if the PTI came to power, they would never let the blasphemy law be amended. He insists that the war on terror is an alien war brought to the country by the Americans. What he does not take into account are the conditions of Pakistan where radical extremism is escalating at an alarming rate. Even if Pakistan abandons its partnership with the US, terror will continue, groups who believe that their version of Islam should be imposed in Pakistan will continue to attack the Pakistan government and the people.

Mr. Khan keeps talking about “Sharia law” and how he plans on introducing it in Pakistan. Clearly, he is not the leftist he claims to be. Whose Sharia law Mr. Khan? General Zia’s? The Sip-e-Sahaba’s? Sharia can be interpreted in many different ways and with his alliances with the far right leaning religious parties of Pakistan, the Sharia he will impose could be quite harsh. Will his Sharia go as far as stopping all male female interaction if the pair in question are not related as is the case with many types of Sharia law? Perhaps Mr. Khan believes that by imposing the same brand of Sharia that the Taliban want in Pakistan he will be able to convince them not to attack the government of Pakistan and its citizens. These are all questions we need to think about before we decide to go out and vote for him. Voting is a freedom, by voting in a man who wants to establish Sharia, will we be giving up our own freedoms? Yes Mr. Khan has now become a force to be reckoned with and yes, Mr. Khan does has the power to change a lot. The question we must ask ourselves is, are the changes he wants to introduce a good idea?



http://youtu.be/jIRgiYs8LK4

the death of idealism

Ever since I have come back to Pakistan to work on my masters thesis, there have been exactly two incidents which have made me shout out loud the phrase, “what the fuck?” upon waking up and reading the latest news online. The first incident to which I refer is the assassination of the Punjab Governor Taseer. The second article that made me utter the profanity instantly was due to yesterday’s brutal murder of yet another leftist politician and Cabinet Minister Shahbaz Bhatti who was also a member of a minority religious group.

The murders themselves are tragic for the family members of the deceased, but they signify an even bigger tragedy, one that threatens to engulf the whole nation. While the country has faced bombing after bombing, the number of official scandals increase, while the law and order situation in this country is deplorable, it is these two news items that have affected Pakistan the most. These murders have impacted the rights of the citizens of Pakistan more than anything else and left me, an idealist human rights student feeling like there is not much hope for my own country.

my own bereavement for my state aside, these crimes have resulted in proving two things; one, that minorities and leftists who dare speak out are facing mortal peril, and two, the image of “the Land of the Pure” in the international world can be tarnished further. In a country founded by a minority Shia, irresponsible fatwas are given out by mullah’s everyday, yet none seem to be arrested for inciting hatred and violence. Contemptible media personalities such as Kamran Shahid and and Meher Bokhari get away with inciting more hatred and intolerance. Murderers are hailed as being Islamic heros by highly educated professionals and are offered free legal representation by insidious lawyers who ironically seem to ignore the very concepts of the rule of law or freedom of speech enshrined in the constitution. Everything damaging to the state and its people is blamed on “the foreign hand” regardless of local inefficiency and bad policy that cannot be changed due to fear of the “Mullah” and ergo, the risk of facing death.

In conditions such as these, with this new wave of religious intolerance, extremism, militancy and loss of life, is it a wonder that the world calls Pakistan a failing or a failed state?

http://www.dawn.com/2011/01/05/blasphemy-law-claims-another-life.html

http://tribune.com.pk/story/126287/shahbaz-bhatti-attacked-in-islamabad/

Here’s to you, Aacia Bibi and Govenor Taseer

Ser independiente es cosa de una pequeña minoría, es el privilegio de los Fuertes (It is the business of the very few to be independent; it is a privilege of the strong)


Nietzsche


Here’s to you, Aacia Bibi, Jesus Loves You More Than You Will Know, Woah Woah Woah!



In a hostile environment filled with biases, what chance did poor Aacia Bibi have? ? That’s right, Aacia Bibi. We all feel sorry for Aafia, hell, the “saviour” of the people, the Punjab Government feels sorry for Aafia and goes out of its way to protect her and yet wont touch this one with a ten foot pole. Our conservative politicians and the rightist elements have kept up their practice of disappointing those who champion minority rights. Alternatively, the eloquence of Sherry Rehman’s article on blasphemy laws and her demands in parliament were truly inspirational for the idealistic. There were few others who dared to take a stand against such issues. The Punjab Governor, Salman Taseer had the courage to stand up against "the black law"; something to be applauded considering that most members of parliament were too scared to do anything about it. In a country such as Pakistan where intolerance, xenophobia and extremism is rising, perhaps the politicians are right not to fight for justice because it can end up costing their lives at it did for Governor Taseer.

Right wing fanaticism is on the rise as was proved by The Lahore High Court ex Chief Justice Khawaja Sharif when he deemed Aacia un-releasable because Governors and Presidents apparently cannot pardon blasphemy law victims. A stay order was granted before the president had even had a chance to give her a presidential pardon. A pardon is the right of the official head of state, it goes against the concept of separation of powers for a judge to block it. The Supreme Court Bar Association’s president, member of the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan and Partner at the law firm come NGO AGHS Asma Jehangir’s criticisms regarding certain judicial norms that were ignored make much sense.

The ex Lahore High Court Chief Justice has ignored justice for the needy. Irony people, or do Mr. Friedrich Nietzsche’s words just start to make sense? The strong right wing Mullahs need only protest on the streets of Islamabad and the government cowers to their demands. With a weak PPP government running the center with thirteen people short in their coalition to maintain a majority, who will have the courage to speak up against a law that discriminates and is easily misused? So why the hypocrisy regarding the save Aaafia but screw Aacia debate? This is where we as a society need to examine ourselves. Why do we not have the will to speak out against a law we know is not just barbaric and easy to manipulate for political purposes and personal biases, but one that is part of a bigger evil, the so called Sharia Law that General Zia gave us that allowed a blind teenage girl to be convicted of sexual promiscuity for being raped. Until we can find someone to rally around, someone with the courage that Governor Taseer displayed, these human rights violations shall continue.

http://www.dawn.com/2010/12/01/asma-jahangir-assails-lhc%E2%80%99s-aasia-order.html

http://www.altmuslimah.com/a/b/a/3448/

http://www.dawn.com/2011/01/05/blasphemy-law-claims-another-life.html

The Year 2210; Speech by the Republican President of the United States of America

My fellow Americans! I am proud to tell you that our colonization of the moon has been successful thanks to the wonderful corporations that assisted us in wiping out the natives! Now that we have succeeded in introducing oxygen and plant life on the moon, we can start letting the general public come and take advantage of the super-luxury apartments with TouchWall ™ technology that Microsoft in conjunction with Intel is offering. The apartments are housed in compounds protecting us from terrorists by XE (formerly known as Blackwater) Security.

Investment into new places to live provides us with unprecedented opportunities and access to a whole new set of resources. The United States of America now owns the Moon and will expect foreign states to pay us for the resources they utilize from us such as moon-light. We will be introducing the “Moon-Light Trade Treaty” at the headquarters of the World Trade Organization to set a standard rate of 35% of each state’s GDP to continue to use US assets. China and Iran have stated that they will not be joining the “Moon-Light Trade Treaty” so America has no choice but to impose economic sanctions on these rogue states.

Unfortunately, today we live in a world of uncertainly and doubt. Due to the terrorist threat on the moon, income tax will be raised by 40% to pay the good people of XE to keep us safe and the Microsoft to keep us connected. This applies to all citizens, on Earth and Abroad.

Now, there is huge controversy going on regarding the building of a Mosque near the artificial oasis we created in sector G13 on the dark side of the Moon. Regardless of the number of Churches, Wiccan Temples, and Synagogues built around that site, I feel that letting a mosque be built on the moon will encourage people like Usama Bin Ladin (even if he has been dead for the better part of a century). America is a state of religious tolerance and freedom. Therefore, to protect that freedom, to stop something like 9/11 from ever happening again, we cannot let the mosque be built. Thank you my fellow Americans and God Bless!

Time to change the way we fight the war on terror?

With bombings on a daily basis, it is clear that the American, Afghani and Pakistani policy of eradicating terrorism has not worked. Militants (be they Taliban, Al Qaida, LeT or Jundullah) seem very apt at retaliating state aggression with explosions and taking innocent lives with them in the process. As in the previous entry, a suggestion regarding how to handle terrorism needs to be made. It seems that taking away their future ranks may not be enough; we need to do something to protect the people from the militants of today. Pakistan can try a new innovative strategy. Seeing how conventional methods have not met with much success, a complete overhaul might just provide the assistance we need to beat militancy. If these radical measures work, we can recommend them to the American and Afghani governments and even NATO.

As we have done before, we should try making deals with individuals in the banned militant outfits to neutralize the terrorist threat. However, unlike the earthly deals that the army, intelligence agencies and politicians have made so far, we need to make heavenly deals in the same way that Al Zahwari and Mullah Omar’s people do. Perhaps General Kiyani could try to lure the terrorists to play for the right team. “Hey you! Yes you in the turban and the wispy beard! Are you an Al Qaida member? Excellent! Boy have I got a deal for you! What’s Usama offering you? 72 virgins? That’s it? He couldn’t do better than that? Look, I’ve got a better offer for you… work for me and I’ll make sure when you die, you get 74 virgins, and I’ll even throw in 20 sloppy seconds!”

People like Faisal Shehzad (the New York City would be bomber) might not be as easily hoodwinked though. For them, a more subtle approach might be better. Send a British Old Labour Party worker to go visit him. The two can start to bond over how evil the capitalist system is, how the economic decline that resulted in Mr. Shehzad’s home foreclosure was a result of the evil capitalism loving God fearing right-wingers and the only way to deal with such issues is to become a left wing American Democrat and get your views across. Better yet, make Mr Shehzad a sob story on on of Micheal Moore's documentaries about the evils of capitalism and the current political setup in America.Of course, someone of Faisal Shehzad’s ethnicity may never progress in American politics but at least he won’t have his head filled with thoughts of declaring war on a sovereign state and then try to blow up Times New Square.

Pakistan needs to start thinking “outside the box” to come up with a way to battle this menace. The time for conventional war is over and we have seen it fail. Madrassas and training camps are beginning to mushroom all over the country and the state has been unable to do much to stop it. While these may seem to be drastic measures, ones that might be met with scorn and ridicule, they certainly do seem to be worth a try seeing that everything else General Kiyani and (previously) Musharraf tried has failed.

Replacing madrassas with Coke Studio

In Pakistan, the last decade has been a rather discerning one in terms of human security with “Johnny Jihads” blowing up innocent people in public places. Many of these Johnnys are a product of the brainwashing institutions called madrassas. With promises of taking care of children from under privileged backgrounds, the Mullahs running the place tend to teach chauvinistic right wing Jihadist philosophy, prepping many of an entire generation of “students” in the art of self explosions with instructions to take as many victims with them as they can while exploding. The rationale for this is one that pulls at the heartstrings of pubescent boys in a sexually repressed society such as Pakistan;, die for God (because he wants you to kill people) and you will be rewarded with more than 70 virgins once you go to Heaven.

Sex has become a weapon wielded by the religious right to recruit more to their cause. With the right wing Punjab Government cracking down on late night mobile phone packages, the state is helping establish a new era of sexual repression, one that distances the already bipolar world of man and woman. At the same time, since the federal government (under both Musharraf and the PPP) has been reluctant to anger the right wing power-brokers by abolishing these breeding holes of terrorism, it would be quite unpatriotic to not offer an alternative “out-of the-box” solution to this dilemma. The state should take over havoc creating madrassas and replace the mullahs with projectors showing songs from Coke Studio. The Song “Alif Allah” by Arif Lohar features a cool female celeb, Meesha Shafi (of Overload fame) who sings about the “Oneness of God” with folk singer Arif Lohar. This can be accompanied by the track by Saieen Zahoor, “Aik Alif” The mysticism associated with Sufi music will help lend a feel of religious devotion to these new fangled educational institutions. The religious right will get their message of God across to otherwise doomed-to-a-short-life-of-self-explosion-children while the left will get the “students’ to realize that music and female vocal chords are quite wonderful things. It’s a win-win situation!

Once these children learn to accept the wondrous world of art, they may not feel the need to try and destroy it. In fact, it might even contribute towards eradicating widespread philistine beliefs regarding thespians- a move that is immensely needed in Pakistan. If the state wants to be really daring it can add the occasional Indian film in to the mix and let the children get accustomed to people who may not be Muslim and realize that not all of them are agents of the Devil or out to kill all Muslims. A good holocaust film would also do a world of good but might raise more controversy than all the above measures combined. Exposure to the likes of Kareena Kapoor and Katrina Kaif and their rather splendid curves will hopefully make “madrassa students” realize that many of our Indian neighbors are wonderful and gorgeous people. The promise of gorgeous women might awaken these children to normal beliefs about earthly women and life being and important as well. Perhaps realizing that Katrina could tempt a saint might bring acceptance in an otherwise xenophobic and sexist society. Without the support of these budding Taliban and Al Qaida members, these two organizations will find themselves with receding numbers and will not therefore be as much of a threat as they are today.